The above question was asked by an Anziano who I deeply respect and love, to an Anziano whom I similarly love, and have had the opportunity to serve around, throughout the course of my mission. The events which led up to the question being asked, are insignificant, and uninspiring, yet as I was told the story, when the above line was uttered, I was taken aback. First at the bravado necessary to imply otherwise, second and more importantly, was the beginning of and inspiration for another one of Anziano Toronto's classic self-reflections, which generally get written about, being among the most interesting things happening throughout a slower weeks. All truth be told, my self-examinations take place daily, you just have the pleasure of reading about them when lack of subject material forces me to be an ever more creative as a writer.
The length of the exposition was admittedly an attempt to make what follows seem more significant. Forgive me if I seem scatterbrained, lack of sleep and spending lots of time in the sun is catching up on me. Here we go...
What I determined to be the root of my self-reflection, was my fear of letting down my mom, or similarly the Lord, President Pickerd, Zone Members, my companion, or any number of wonderful people who see me go about doing the Lord's work. I suppose the sweetest words I could ever hear would be those from the Lord of the Vineyard saying, "Well done thou good and faithful servant." Yet in my fear, I often forget the Lord uses, and has always used flawed vessels to accomplish his great work. These flawed instruments manage to sound out the desired melody, only as they allow the master to wield them. Think Moses, Enoch, and Joseph Smith, with each of their inadequacies, and Anziano Toronto with all of his. Yet each was called, qualified, and blessed in their desires to serve. Joseph was torn apart multiple times by Moroni, other angels, and even more than them, the Lord, in public revelation. Enoch was slow of speech, and hated of men. Moses similarly inadequate in oration, and fearful of the Pharaoh. The Lord shapes and molds each servant on the potters wheel, and eventually they begin to look like a finished product. As a full time missionary, you could say I'm in the advanced stages of production. The clay has been formed, beaten, scolded, loved, admonished, inspired, encouraged, and though it still looks like something that belongs in a 3rd grade art room, it's getting the job done. Just as Goldie took me from point A to point B without fail, (certainly there was divine intervention there), the imperfect vessel was made useful, profitable, and essential in bringing me where I needed to be. In a like manner, despite my occasional flat tire, or lack of oil, a window that needs duct tape to keep it up, and air conditioning that is spotty to put it generously, the Lord uses me, and likewise each of his divinely called and ordained servants, to help others make the trip from Heavenly Father's point A, to point B.
Connecting these thoughts, I know my mom, (and all those who know me), are aware of my imperfections. Hopefully, and almost assuredly however, Mom understands that this vessel is trying, despite his rust. I love the Savior, and am grateful for the special experiences I've had throughout my mission, that have allowed me to know him far more personally and appreciate his sacrifice to a much greater degree. Whom the Lord calls, he qualifies, and that has hardly been made more manifest than in the refining of Anziano Christian Young Toronto!
Vi voglio un sacco di bene,
ATII🇮🇹
(As for pics, Godwin Studios is workin hard on some beauties, so stay tuned in coming weeks)
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